It’s not always easy being the scapegoat; the one everyone uses to learn life lessons. This is in no way me judging Tiwa Savage and her husband Tee Billz. Human beings make mistakes but it is important that they and indeed others learn from it.
It’s been a very heartbreaking few days in the Nigerian music industry as we have had to watch the marriage of Tiwa Savage and Tunji Balogun A.K.A Tee Billz tear apart. We woke up on the 28th of April to see Instagram suicide notes all over Tee Billz’s account.
He divulged so many dirty family secrets and made so many outrageous claims against his wife Tiwa Savage. He accused her of having extramarital affairs with Don Jazzy, Dr Sid and Tuface, called her mother a witch, amongst many other claims. Above all, he said he was going to end his life as he could not take her shenanigans anymore. Celebrities reached out to him and hours later, he was found on Lekki-Ikoyi toll bridge about to dive into the Lagoon to end it all.
He later foolishly claimed that his Instagram account was hacked. Perhaps, his body was hacked as well.
Anyway, people blamed Tiwa Savage for been such a horrible wife to Tee Billz and taking away his manhood.
We were not ready for what we got 24hours later when Tiwa Savage granted an exclusive interview to Pulse.ng where she opened more cans of rotten worms. Ultimately announcing that her marriage to Tee Billz was very over.
According to her, Tee Billz is a drug addict, a grossly irresponsible father who pays absolutely no bill, a thief who steals her money and a chronic debtor. She claimed she had had to deal with a drunk husband almost every day and she recently discovered that he uses cocaine.
She also claimed that while she was having a miscarriage during a video shoot in Jamaica, Tee Billz was in a hotel room sleeping with a woman whose name he saved as ‘Edible catering’ on his phone.
We could go on and on but how about we just pick out the moral lessons from this scandal?
Here are my Top 5 lessons.
1. Ladies and Gentlemen, don’t let any sort of pressure push you into marriage
Draw your two ears now and hear o! Tiwa Savage stated it clearly in her interview with Pulse that she made a mistake marrying Tee Billz ( It’s now obvious that Tee Billz also married her for the wrong reasons.)
This is the harsh reality many married couples wake up to every morning and the reason behind the failure of many marriages. Tiwa Savage was 33-years-old when Tee Billz proposed marriage to her. Let’s face fact, this is Nigeria, you can imagine how everyone would have been asking her the dreaded ‘When are you getting married?’
Also, knowing that a man is a baby daddy is enough reason to want to investigate before jumping the broom with him. If he can make babies with another woman and not care to marry her, there’s a probability that his polygamous appetite will only keep expanding.
Walking into Tee Billz sniffing cocaine was definitely Tiwa Savage’s ‘Who are you?’ moment. She even admitted to discovering from Tee Billz’s suicide notes on Instagram that he has another secret child with an unknown baby mama.
Tiwa Savage was married to a stranger indeed.
2. Marital issues are not pieces of dirty laundry people should wash in public
As entertaining as this Tiwa Savage-Tee Billz drama has been for many social media users, many people would rather they did not have to hear about the gory details of the celebrity marriage. Tee Billz acted irrationally by coming out on social media to rant in the first place. No real man comes out to expose his family like that. A husband is the covering of his wife. Tiwa Savage on the other hand finally nailed the coffin with her ‘Olivia Pope’ planned interview. She killed Tee Billz.
Two wrongs don’t make a right. Besides, aren’t there family members, Pastors or Imams, close friends and marriage counsellors who would have handled their issues better?
Don’t get it twisted, social media users are just looking out for the next secret and dirty detail so that they can create funny memes and hashtags.
3. Baby Jamil is the one who will bear the brunt
Like I always say, when two elephants fight, it is the grass that suffers. The less than 6-months old baby Jamil will now have to live with a visiting Dad and a single mother; another dysfunctional family has been born.
Also, in this era of internet and massive storage of documents, imagine someone is just saving all the Instagram posts from Tee Billz and the Tiwa savage video on drop box, memory cards, icloud, e.t.c. and then later Jamil grows up to see all the embarrassing stuff. Chai!
4. Being the ‘I pulled her out of the gutter’ guy is not a job!
Yes o! Uncle Tee Billz, we know you made Tiwa Savage known in the Nigerian music scene but that one no be Job! If she sacked you from being her manager, move on. Losing a job or not even having a job in the first place is not the end of the world. A real man who realizes that he has a wife and son to care for even if his wife is a billionaire, would still hustle to bring something home rather than become an entitled parasite on his wife’s income.
So many wives today have to cope with full house husbands who do not have a means of income and live off their wives, yet they maltreat them. I know that in marriage the two become one and what’s his becomes hers and vice versa. But when one person is carrying the load of two people, one can break down.
Tee Billz built his world around Tiwa Savage’s career and after she fired him from being her manager due to family issues (she would later tell us that he was stealing her money), he simply never got round to doing anything of economic importance.
We know how this kind of situation can affect a man’s ego and it obviously consumed Tee Billz who was still living above his means and piling up debts, according to Tiwa Savage.
5. You are responsible for the choices you make
Tee Billz blamed Tiwa Savage, her mother, his father, his joblessness… EVERYTHING but himself for everything that happened to him. Tee Billz Biko, who was there when you were becoming a multiple baby Daddy or were you raped?
For crying out loud, Tee Billz is a fully mature man who should know his wrong from right.
Accept your choices and deal with your personal demons. Carry your cross and stop crying all over the place like a child or simply take it to God in prayers.
Anyways… We hope for the best for Tiwa Savage and Tee Billz. It is well o.