A lot of people do not like to hear this, but the truth is… marriage is hard. Being a good partner in marriage is harder than being a good parent or excelling on the job. Both of those things take work, perseverance, and patience. But marriage is just … well, different.
Below are 7 tips that will help you fix your marriage when it seems like nothing else is working:
#1. Schedule couple time.
There are times you just feel so upset about your partner, but that is the best time to do things together. Whether it’s date night, downtime or sexy time, be deliberate about your time spent as a couple and you might surprise yourself and find that you’re looking forward to it.
#2. Schedule alone time.
Even the most extroverted extrovert needs some alone time. If you’re going through marriage troubles or even just experiencing doubts, taking that extra time to take care of you is very important. Meditate, exercise or do something that gives you peace. If you take the time to nurture yourself, you’ll be a better partner.
#3. Make a list of your partner’s good qualities.
Sit down and make a list of the things you like about your partner. There’s something that attracted you to him or her in the first place. Focus on those things, it helps to keep your mind on positive traits.
#4. Make sex a daily thing.
If you are struggling with your feelings about your marriage, have sex. It reinforces closeness and those lovey-dovey romantic feelings, and, well, do you really need other reasons to have sex?
#5. Stop holding grudges.
Yes, this is much easier to preach than to practice. But seriously, stop holding grudges. There may be things about him or her you don’t like, but you have to decide whether or not you can live with them and accept them.
#6. Accept responsibility for your actions.
This goes along with “stop holding grudges.” You have your flaws too, and the potholes in your relationship probably have a least a little to do with you. While you’re working on your relationship, be cognizant of things you’re doing to stall it.
#7. Realize that all marriages have rocky patches.
Sometimes love, like, and common ground aren’t enough to make a marriage go. Even the best marriages experience some storms and to expect perfection is not realistic.