another week and another series of Dear Davina’s. Thanks for your readership and your comments of the ones from last week.
Ths week I want to deal with letters that concern behaviours in relationships. I have 3 of those this week.
Thanks so much for your articles. My name is Kamdora and I have a big issue at hand. I’ve been dating my girlfriend for about two years. I am 30 and she’s 33years. my issue with her is that she’s very jealous. She goes through my phone and gets really angry if she sees messages from any girl.
I have never cheated on her before and I have tried explaining things to her. At my place of work, I have several female colleagues and sometimes I have to work late with them. she’s always thinking and acting like I cheat on her.
She uses very abusive and hurtful words. She later apologizes but does it over and over again. I’m on the verge of a break up because I don’t know how long I can take it. kindly advise.
Relationships are built on communication and conversation. The words spoken in relationships are very important as they can foster or hinder the relationships. People interpret words based on the situations or circumstances the words are spoken. Words can heal or they can tear apart. It is thus important that people in relationships should take care and be sensitive to the words they speak to each other.
Looking at the age gap between both of you, it is obvious that your gf is suffering from insecurity issues. I don’t have enough information about her job, pay grade or school grade compared to yours for me to make deeper judgements but she obviously needs more reassurances.
While you might not be cheating on her or might not have cheated on her, there might be some way you are relating to other females that is making her have concerns about your fidelity. too many times, people don’t realise that certain closeness to the opposite sex could send wrong signals to the other partner. It could be worse if she has been burned in a former relationship.
I would advise that you both have a long and sincere talk. Listen to her. Here out her concerns and fears and address them. Also, let her know your concerns and feelings and work with her to assuage her feelings.
Some ladies, however, have deep-seated insecurity problems that would be difficult to deal with without proper counselling. I would deal with that in the next Dear Davina.
Much love and grace.
TO ALL DD READERS….
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I look forward to hearing from you