Another Valentine’s Day, and another year you’re feeling frustrated with your love life. Why is learning how to find your soulmate so complicated?

Here’s the best dating advice on how to find your soulmate, so it’ll be the last year you’re single on Valentine’s Day.

1. Look into your past relationships and learn from them.

The way to ensure that this will be the last Valentine’s Day that you’re without your beloved is to take a deep dive into your own personal relationship history. Understanding your past patterns and strategies in relationships will give you insight into how to approach things differently this time.

Digging into your specific relationship patterns gives you insight into what worked and what didn’t, and how to do things differently moving forward..

2. Embrace any emotions that come up.

Doing this exercise will also probably bring up a lot of old emotions. Feel them. Don’t try to hide from them or ignore them. Allow them to surface and flow through you — they won’t last forever. Allow the emotions to move through your body, feel them and then let them go.

When going over your past history, you may find that there is still some hurt, anger, sadness, or grief about past situations. You may feel this way about the other person, or you may feel this way about your behavior in the relationship.

3. Let go, so you can start to move on.

With all of these emotions resurfacing, this is a great opportunity to forgive yourself for the past, release those trapped feelings and start fresh.

Releasing your past hurts frees you from your old dynamic allowing you to create a new one moving forward. Now, you’re ready to start looking for love and dating differently than you’ve done in the past.

4. Express your needs — and see how they respond.

When you are dating someone new, make a point to share requests and ask for what you want in a relationship. Don’t be shy, and don’t expect the other person to read your mind. The only way to get what you want is to ask for it.

Pay attention to how the person you are dating responds to you. How they behave and treat you under a variety of circumstances will inform you about the kind of person they are and what a long-term relationship with them might be like.

Don’t shy away from the uncomfortable conversations, either. You want to know if the two of you can navigate conflict together.

5. Look deeper for shared values.

When your values are a match with your partner’s, then you can navigate the inevitable challenges that life will bring your way together. What often tears people apart is a stressful event or situation that reveals that the two of you didn’t really value the same things to begin with.

Knowing you share values is so much more important than the kind of movies or music you like. And the best way to discover what someone values is by spending time with them and paying attention to how they spend their resources.

6. Visualize your soulmate relationship.

As you get clear on how your soulmate relationship functions, you’ll want to put some time and energy visualizing yourself living your life alongside your beloved.

Hold the vision of what you desire in your mind’s eye often. Begin to act as if you know that, beyond a shadow of a doubt, your soulmate is on their way to you.

7. Say “yes.”

All of the previous steps were just the preparation. The opportunity to find your soulmate comes when you put effort into meeting new people.

Look for reasons to say “yes”:

  • Yes to a date
  • Yes to online dating
  • Yes to go to a party where you don’t know anyone
  • Yes to being curious about people
  • Yes to being set up on a blind date

Put yourself out there. Be curious and open. Say “yes” and date often, but take things slowly and don’t give your heart away to a stranger. Take time to discover who a person really is. Make them earn the benefit of the doubt.

This dating strategy will allow you to create the long-lasting, soul-satisfying love you desire and will ensure that this is the last Valentine’s Day you’re single.

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