My Survivor story are stories from people who had to face adversity and overcome. These adverse situations are defining and very traumatic situations in their personal lives. My Survivor stories are stories from people who had to face adversity and overcome. These adverse situations are defining and very traumatic situations in their personal lives. Usually, we deal with situations arising from relationships such as rape, molestation, domestic violence, abuse etc. We also deal with failures of any sort. The heroes and heroines here rose from the ashes and bitterness of failure to remodel their lives. You can send yours to davina.r@davinadiaries.com.

Please Click Here To Read Part One of Amaka’s Story

My Survivor Story, Amaka Part Two: The Rape

After sitting at the edge of his bed, He asked me to close my eyes which I did then he took my hand and I felt a cool sensation as he fastened something unto my wrist and asked me to open my eyes. He had given me a gold bracelet adorned with stones.

While I was still admiring the bracelet on my wrist, he turned my face towards him and drew me into a kiss, gentle at first, the kiss became heated as he began to ravage my mouth with his tongue with his hands all over me. When I finally pulled away, wondering what the fierce kiss was all about he tried lowering me on my back into sleeping position, I was going to resist when he said “relax babe. I have another surprise for you” in a calm and soothing tone.

As he said that, he brought out a tie like material and placed it over my eyes and fastened it to blindfold me, while I kept smiling with music still blaring loud from his speakers. Moments later, I heard the click of his door as he locked it and heard the music volume go higher. Before I could give it a second thought, I felt Steven’s lips on mine lightly then he said, “Today, I’m going to make you a woman”.

I half panicked at his words, at the same time thinking he was sort of joking but before I got to ask what he meant by his words or free my eyes of the blindfold to look at him, he was already atop me using his heavy weight to pin me down.

I tried not to panic, thinking it was just going to be like his other failed attempts, so I calmly told him I wasn’t interested in becoming a woman also reminding him that my parents will practically skin me alive should I lose my virginity. “They won’t find out” was his answer and continued trying to undress me.

It was at this point I noticed my boyfriend sounded fierce and dangerous so I resorted to pleading with him to hold on a while for us to talk things over before we do something we would both come to regret. It was as though my pleas fell on deaf ears for Steven now proceeded to pin my hands together above my head with one of his hands while trying to keep my wiggling form in place with the other.

The blood in my veins chilled when I heard Steven say that I had two options to chose from, he said it’s either I relax and enjoy what was about to happen or struggle with him and take it the hard way. “Either ways, I’m going to make love to you and confirm if you are indeed the virgin you claim to be. You are my girl and you always said you love me so, is your virginity so special that you can’t give to the one you love?” He asked with a wicked leer in his voice.

“Please Steve, I’m not ready….” I kept pleading “When will you ever be? I’ve waited so long for you to be ready. Never mind, you will enjoy this and ask for more by the time I’m done, trust me. “No! You Can’t! I screamed thinking that someone would hear me and come save me from this beast of a human but my scream sounded like whimpers in the wake of the loud music coming from the speakers of his home theatre.

And it was then I realised it was all planned: The luring, the gift, the loud music…. all was a ploy by my so-called boyfriend to have sex with me or rape me. So I thought to myself, I will rather die than allow this beast take away my pride without a fight, I was filled with dread and fury at the same time mixed with pure irritation, so I spat in his face and screamed: “I will kill you and kill myself if you do this”.

Nothing prepared me for the deep, throaty, wicked laughter that came from him just before he gave me a hard punch on my shoulder. It was as though a heavy rock fell on me as I became weak and began to lose the fight in me. It was then he tied my hands with a cloth. I still couldn’t see his face but I bet he was smiling all the while at the futility of my struggle. As he unzipped my dress I heard him say “my sweet, sexy, innocent girlfriend is about to be a woman”

Now his sweat was trickling on me and just as I was about to say something, I felt a sharp penetration in my pelvis. Nothing prepared me for this pain for I let out a sharp yelp followed with a shhhhhhhhh coming from my rapist “hush now” he said, “you will soon start to enjoy it” soon he continued followed by a satisfied grunt as he kept pounding me with his organ.

My whole life began to flash in front of me as tears and sweat began soaking the blindfold. I felt life ebbing out of me little by little. Needless to say, the pain I felt didn’t subside as he promised. I began to pray that I die right there or something should happen to make him stop but none of these happened as he gagged me from screaming. Instead, he gained momentum and kept hitting me at the very core of inside until I could take the pain no more.

I passed out. I can’t remember how long I was gone for but as I gained consciousness of my surroundings and began to remember the last moment before I passed out, I gasped for air and struggled to get up. Sitting up felt like the most difficult task on earth as my muscles were weak and my thighs ached badly. Still trying to adjust my eyes to the poorly lit room, murderous anger and bitterness started engulfing my thought with a pang that suddenly gave me the strength to get myself together and pull myself up into a sitting position.

I slid off the bed unto the floor exhausted, it was then that saw a little stain of blood where I had formerly lain and with that fresh tears began welling up my eyes. I managed with the little strength left in me to get dressed wondering where the monster that raped me was. Perhaps he thought I was dead and took off. I tried opening the door and realised it was locked from the outer side.

Bastard! I cussed out loud and promised myself he won’t go unpunished for what he did. I had a feeling he would be back soon, so I entered his kitchen with the thought of getting a knife to arm myself with but there was no sight of that. So I came back to the room, desperately scouting for a weapon to use on him when he gets back. I dug under his bed not knowing what I would find but my fingers enclosed on something metallic and cold so pulled it out and realised I was holding a gun.

I had only seen guns in movies and on law enforcers but staring closely at it in my hands was quite intimidating. The gun fell off my hands onto the rugged floor as I stared at it in shock. Quickly I dug deeper into the bed curious to know who this guy calked Steven really was and why he had a gun in his possession, I dragged out a dagger this time.

Now visibly scared, I dug in again looking for something that would help me make sense of the crazy situation I found myself. This time I found a paper bag with pictures in it so I took out the pictures and there he was, my boyfriend/Rapist in a yellow beret wielding a gun with a cigarette stick in between his lips and in midst of a group of other men dressed in the same fashion as he was.

A closer look at the date imprinted on the picture told me it was taken 2years back so I continued looking through the rest of the pictures and realised without being told that Steven is a die-hard, high ranked cult member.

My hands were shaking uncontrollably at this point as I realised I had been involved with a notorious person who may probably be a criminal or an assassin, my instinct began to scream for me to leave. I quickly began putting the pictures back in the bag and that was when the door swung opened with Steven at the entrance.

The moment he registered the dagger on the floor and pictures in my hand, He began to look enraged and charged into the room. Quickly, I grabbed the gun on the floor while he got to the dagger first and backed away from him not knowing how to use it.

“Drop that” he ordered.
“No!” I replied. “You raped me, defiled me and left here to die. tell me why I shouldn’t pull this trigger.

To be concluded tomorrow.

 

My thoughts…
Majority of all rape is committed by someone close to the victim.
In 60% of the cases, the perpetrator thinks the victim is playing hard to get.
Victims usually assume that they have defined the limits of the intimacy of the relationship but several times the perpetrator assumes that the line can be crossed.

Rape is traumatic and shouldn’t be played with but statistics show that a minimum of 60% of rape cases can be avoided. There is no way of excusing Steven; He was just despicable and broke the borders of a relationship but Amaka also in retrospect agrees that the signs were there.

Please note that this in no way vilifies the victim. Amaka agreed that I could drop my Observations so that someone else can learn. She also agrees with my observations. If you don’t want to sleep with a guy, define the lines. Kissing, fondling getting all worked up and having to escape blur the lines. When those lines are crossed, it becomes difficult to hold the other party to an agreement. Of course, there is also the blurred safety of the thought that you are with a loved one who would respect you and not cross the line but statistics has shown that they do cross the line.

My advice…
Draw and establish the lines from the first day of the relationship. Ensure the boundaries don’t cross. Where the lines cross, re-establish them. Where you notice that the other party is walking out of line, please don’t play on hope; walk away and call it quits.

Rape is a violation. Several rape victims go through so much trauma that leaves them scarred for life. We have the final part of the story tomorrow and I will comment on picking up the pieces and moving on after.
see you soon
Ross T.

1 COMMENT

  1. You really do know your stuff Davina. Rape is indeed caused mostly by people very close. So its difficult to get people to believe you. And its so shameful an act. I almost fell victim to rape but luckily in the end person didnt go all the way. But the shock, fear, pain and hatred l have had for him since then only God knows. he has apologized severally l have forgiven him l told him but we are not on good terms any more. just dont want anything to do with him. i feel the pain of our lady and pray she seeks help and heal properly. There will be some phobia but it will die down with time.

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