The Rich Now Cry… For “Buhari’s corruption list” comes like a thief in the night to expose, embarrass and popularize you. Therefore, while you are waiting for your turn when the spotlight of anti-corruption will shine on your ‘thiefly’ face, prepare yourself.

I have made this list based on the trend I have noticed in the last few months since the launch of President Buhari’s war against corruption, which has just begun.

While #Dasukigate and #NIMASA scandal keep us entertained, I’m addressing this post particularly to those soiled hands in the Nigerian Customs and NNPC. Your ‘big day’ is almost here, how are you preparing? Here’s what you can do before President  Buhari’s corruption list carrying your name surfaces:

  • You can either travel to that Caribbean island or middle Eastern country where you bought a mansion and never return to Nigeria; at least not while President Buhari is still president; or pay the President a Nicodemus visit in which you can confess all your sins and return part if not all the loot in your possession. Please remember Dubai property is now no show.
  • Start declaring your innocence on social media and accuse the present administration of being biased. Win the hearts of the Nigerian masses. You will soon discover that people were only re-tweeting your tweets for entertainment. The very few influencers are laughing at your impending doom.

Col. Dasuki Claims He acted In The Best Interest Of Nigeria

 

If you are not fortunate enough to have had a sweet escape before the list is made public or the DSS whisks you away, there are still a few things you can do to salvage the situation. Remember, many routes lead to the market.

  • Disappear from social media. This is not the time to tweet or instagram just get lost but if you insist on connecting with the world you can hire a reputation manager preferably a highly priced Senior Advocate of Nigeria to deal with all your social media trolls while you sort yourself out.
  • Strategically choose a very deadly disease; may be cancer, sclerosis or even Ebola and ask to travel abroad for urgent treatment so you don’t spend the night in Kuje prisons (where you truly belong.) Remember you had stolen public funds meant to build good hospitals so there isn’t the capacity or expertise to treat you with and that’s a sound reason you’ve got there. You can even send pictures of yourself strapped to a life support machine to newspapers and bloggers to publish online to get the empathy you desire…

The Rich Now Cry: 7 things to do when you find your name on Buhari’s list

More Pictures Of Sickly Mrs Diezani Alison-Madueke Surfaces

Mrs Diezani Says She Wasn’t Pres. Goodluck Jonathan’s Mistress

 

If that fails,

  • Humbly appear in court in handcuffs wearing your chieftaincy cap and attire so that your kinsmen will be mad at such utter disrespect of your culture.

image-4

Adams Oshiomole Thinks Metuh Deserves To Be In Cuffs

Witness Says Metuh Gave Her $2M To Invest

 

  • If they fail to notice that, grab a wheelchair, stretcher or walk in on crutches or better still wear an oxygen mask. The judge wouldn’t want the courtroom turned into a morgue suddenly so you’re sure to get bail;

image-2

 

image-1

Nimasa Scam: How Fashion Designer Got N546M For Doing Nothing 

 

  • If that fails, tear and swallow your police statements, confessions and other vital evidences. Worst case scenario, you get a bond set at millions of Naira that never belonged to you in the first place and 2 sureties who have houses in Maitama- that should be very easy to produce in your inner circle of ‘yam eaters’

 

If after producing all of that, you still find yourself lounging in the VIP of Kuje Prisons or some unknown place, because you simply don’t have any human rights; plus you realize you have been sacked by the political party for which you were a formidable mouthpiece because they are suddenly now in search of ‘Credible’ leadership, you must now realize that you are officially On Your Own- O.Y.O.

image-3

You are not even an Israelite between the red sea and an approaching army. You are under the red sea of your misdoings. You will now be properly paraded in Black Marias and handcuffs and tried before the Nigerian law.

You will now realize that Nigeria’s Justicia (that woman holding the sword and scales in both hands in front of the high court) is not blind folded. In fact, her eyes are wide open before she gets missing like 2016 budget.

 

At this point you might get a few years jail term, get mistakenly assassinated or be lucky enough to be forgotten in which case you can shamelessly contest for a senatorial position in 2019.

Sen. Musliu Obanikoro Allegedly Collected N4.74bn From Col. Dasuki

You can do all this or decide to be a person of integrity while in public service so you can save yourself and family all this drama.

15 COMMENTS

  1. Decamp 2 APC-All Past Criminals & ur name will be deleted by PMB after consultation with JAGABAN. Hhhhhmmmm!!!???apc-change!

  2. 7 things to do when you find your
    name on Buhari’s Corruption list
    The Rich Now Cry… For “Buhari’s
    corruption list” comes like a thief in the
    night to expose, embarrass and
    popularize you. Therefore, while you are
    waiting for your turn when the spotlight
    of anti-corruption will shine on your
    ‘thiefly’ face, prepare yourself.
    I have made this list based on the trend I
    have noticed in the last few months since
    the launch of President Buhari’s war
    against corruption, which has just
    begun.
    While #Dasukigate and #NIMASA
    scandal keep us entertained, I’m
    addressing this post particularly to those
    soiled hands in the Nigerian Customs
    and NNPC. Your ‘big day’ is almost here,
    how are you preparing? Here’s what you
    can do before President Buhari’s
    corruption list carrying your name
    surfaces:
    You can either travel to that
    Caribbean island or middle Eastern
    country where you bought a
    mansion and never return to
    Nigeria; at least not while President
    Buhari is still president; or pay the
    President a Nicodemus visit in
    which you can confess all your sins
    and return part if not all the loot in
    your possession. Please remember
    Dubai property is now no show.
    Start declaring your innocence on
    social media and accuse the present
    administration of being biased. Win
    the hearts of the Nigerian masses.
    You will soon discover that people
    were only re-tweeting your tweets
    for entertainment. The very few
    influencers are laughing at your
    impending doom.
    Col. Dasuki Claims He acted In The Best
    Interest Of Nigeria
    If you are not fortunate enough to have
    had a sweet escape before the list is
    made public or the DSS whisks you away,
    there are still a few things you can do to
    salvage the situation. Remember, many
    routes lead to the market.
    Disappear from social media. This is
    not the time to tweet or instagram
    just get lost but if you insist on
    connecting with the world you can
    hire a reputation manager
    preferably a highly priced Senior
    Advocate of Nigeria to deal with all
    your social media trolls while you
    sort yourself out.
    Strategically choose a very deadly
    disease; may be cancer, sclerosis or
    even Ebola and ask to travel abroad
    for urgent treatment so you don’t
    spend the night in Kuje prisons
    (where you truly belong.) Remember
    you had stolen public funds meant
    to build good hospitals so there isn’t
    the capacity or expertise to treat you
    with and that’s a sound reason
    you’ve got there. You can even send
    pictures of yourself strapped to a life
    support machine to newspapers and
    bloggers to publish online to get the
    empathy you desire…
    More Pictures Of Sickly Mrs Diezani Alison-
    Madueke Surfaces
    Mrs Diezani Says She Wasn’t Pres.
    Goodluck Jonathan’s Mistress
    If that fails,
    Humbly appear in court in
    handcuffs wearing your chieftaincy
    cap and attire so that your kinsmen
    will be mad at such utter disrespect
    of your culture.
    Adams Oshiomole Thinks Metuh Deserves
    To Be In Cuffs
    Witness Says Metuh Gave Her $2M To
    Invest
    If they fail to notice that, grab a
    wheelchair, stretcher or walk in on
    crutches or better still wear an
    oxygen mask. The judge wouldn’t
    want the courtroom turned into a
    morgue suddenly so you’re sure to
    get bail;
    Nimasa Scam: How Fashion Designer Got
    N546M For Doing Nothing
    If that fails, tear and swallow your
    police statements, confessions and
    other vital evidences. Worst case
    scenario, you get a bond set at
    millions of Naira that never
    belonged to you in the first place
    and 2 sureties who have houses in
    Maitama- that should be very easy to
    produce in your inner circle of ‘yam
    eaters’
    If after producing all of that, you still
    find yourself lounging in the VIP of Kuje
    Prisons or some unknown place, because
    you simply don’t have any human rights;
    plus you realize you have been sacked by
    the political party for which you were a
    formidable mouthpiece because they are
    suddenly now in search of ‘Credible’
    leadership, you must now realize that
    you are officially On Your Own- O.Y.O.
    You are not even an Israelite between
    the red sea and an approaching army.
    You are under the red sea of your
    misdoings. You will now be properly
    paraded in Black Marias and handcuffs
    and tried before the Nigerian law.
    You will now realize that Nigeria’s
    Justicia (that woman holding the sword
    and scales in both hands in front of the
    high court) is not blind folded. In fact,
    her eyes are wide open before she gets
    missing like 2016 budget.
    At this point you might get a few years
    jail term, get mistakenly assassinated or
    be lucky enough to be forgotten in which
    case you can shamelessly contest for a
    senatorial position in 2019.
    Sen. Musliu Obanikoro Allegedly Collected
    N4.74bn From Col. Dasuki
    You can do all this or decide to be a
    person of integrity while in public
    service so you can save yourself and
    family all this drama.
    Related Posts:

  3. Fighting corruption east only one of the campaign promises. Are we going to duel on fighting corruption for ever?How many people have so far been convicted? The economy is deterioting, people are losing their jobs, the naira is falling and we are still dueling on this public show and entertainment. I want to see implementation of other programmes. I want to see improved standard of living. I want to see convictions. Enough of these side attractions

  4. Sambo Akoma Ga Allah Kowa Murna Yakeyi Da Abuda Yake Faruwa Da Kai Azalimine Baya Muna Da Abu Da Akemika Allah Ya Kiye Gaba Ameeen

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